First Christmas
by jennybenny2845
Summary: They didn't celebrate their first Christmas together thanks to Severus' mistake. Will this year be the same? Written for DobbyRocksSocks. AU. EWE.


**A/N: A belated Christmas gift for my dear friend, Bex. Your friendship has meant the world to me, and I love you lots. This is my first attempt at Snarry, written just for you, so I hope you enjoy it.**

* * *

"Stay," whispered a sleep-laden voice. "I promise I'll make it worth your while," purred Severus Snape's raven-haired lover. The younger man curled into Severus' side and buried his head into the crook of Severus' arm.

Severus glanced down, immediately noticing the hungry look in his emerald-eyed lover's eyes. Shivers ran down Severus' spine, and his face flushed, imagining ways his lover could make it worth his while.

"All right," Severus acquiesced, reluctantly leaning over to hit the snooze button on his alarm clock. He bit his lip, trying to prevent a smile from forming on his face. He had a lot to smile about these days, which puzzled him. The feelings, albeit new, weren't exactly unwelcome.

He sighed and cast his onyx eyes at the ceiling. He thanked Andromeda Tonks from saving him from his death on the cold floor of the dilapidated Shrieking Shack seven years ago. She'd been on her way to Hogwarts, unable to sit idly by while her beloved daughter fought for her life. She'd left Nymphadora's baby boy in the arms of a trusted neighbour, who'd been willing to watch him until Andromeda returned. Andromeda had chosen to enter through the Shrieking Shack, knowing it'd be her best bet to get to the Hogwarts grounds.

Andromeda's light brown eyes had been immediately drawn to the pool of dark red blood that surrounded the dying man. In that moment, Severus became her number one concern. Thoughts of her daughter's safety flew from her mind as she attempted to stop the blood pouring out of his neck. She summoned all her strength and safely Apparated them back to her cottage. She then fled to St Mungo's and convinced a Healer to tend to Severus while she went back to Hogwarts.

The Healer had worked wonders, giving Severus copious amounts of Blood-Replenishing Potion while he performed every Healing Spell he knew. Severus remained in a weeklong coma following the initial treatment. During that time, Andromeda agreed to house him and supervise his recovery. She had been well aware that sending him to St Mungo's would only cause uproar since the Wizarding world believed him dead.

She'd later tell him that caring for him prevented her from spiraling into a dark depression after the deaths of her husband, daughter and son-in-law. She had two people to care for, and she wasn't about to let them down when they needed her most. And so, Severus resided with Andromeda for two years while he recovered.

Severus also thanked his Healer, forever grateful for his role in saving him. He definitely wouldn't be alive if not for that man. He made note to send his Healer something extra special for Christmas, as he did every year. Severus chuckled softly and frowned upon realising how _sentimental_ he'd become over the last seven years. Though, he supposed that being _that_ close to death would do that to a man, and thankfully, he only allowed a _few_ people to see _that_ side of him.

XXX

Severus' smile widened as his raven-haired lover inched even closer to him, lazily wrapping a leg around his lower body, refusing to let him leave the bed. Severus extended him arm and shut off his alarm clock. He could spare a few more minutes in his lover's arms. Unlike him, his lover preferred to stay in bed until the very last minute, making a mad dash to prepare for the day. He often flew into the Great Hall for breakfast with seconds to spare, which always earned him an amused look from Headmistress McGonagall. Severus' never-ending comments about the value of punctuality never seemed to reach his emerald-eyed lover's ears.

During Severus' recovery, Harry Potter had convinced the Wizarding world of Severus' loyalty to the light. It took some persuading, but eventually, the Ministry dropped all charges against him. Harry had singlehandedly won him his freedom, and Severus would be forever thankful to Harry.

Unfortunately, Severus couldn't remain hidden forever. A Squib caught him shopping in Muggle London. News that he hadn't died spread like wildfire, prompting people to call for his arrest and imprisonment. Others demanded he pay a hefty amount of Galleons in restitution to compensate for the amount that had been spent on his funeral and burial arrangements. Again, Harry continued to defend Severus' innocence. Harry's pleas eventually won out, and Severus remained a free man.

Severus' musings turned to Minerva, and he realised that he ought to give thanks to the persistent witch. She had begged him to return to Hogwarts, claiming that no one could hold the Potions post for more than a year. It had taken her a while to convince him, but eventually he conceded and returned.

Three years into his return, the announcement of a new Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor had rattled the staff. Harry Potter had stepped down from his Auror post and accepted Minerva's request that he teach at Hogwarts. The news of Harry's appointment had angered Severus. He had doubted that the young man could teach the class. Severus still coveted the post, and had put in a request for the position once the previous professor retired.

Severus had attempted to make Harry's first year teaching at Hogwarts a living hell. Much to his chagrin, Harry had brushed off Severus' constant insults and requests to explain his course curricula and teaching methods. Severus had done all he could to saddle Harry with the least desirable assignments and tasks when it came to running the school. To Severus' surprise, Harry had accepted his duties without complaint. Harry had stood his ground and patiently explained his teaching methods with an unseen calm and collected demeanor.

Of course, verbal sparring matches had become regular occurrences between the two men once Severus had managed to find the right buttons to press. Severus' condescension and blatant lack of respect had infuriated Harry. Secretly, Severus had loved seeing the young man riled up. He had enjoyed being able to set him off with the right words.

Their constant bickering hadn't gone unnoticed by the rest of the staff. Minerva had requested to see them in the Headmistress' office following their rather heated debate concerning defence against werewolves. Of course, Severus and Harry had bickered all the way down the corridors to her office, only ceasing once they had taken their seats in front of her.

"I believe a wizard's duel in the Room of Requirement is needed to settle _whatever_ it is that's going on between you two," Minerva had declared, looking down at the two men through her square spectacles.

"What if I kill him?" Harry and Severus had asked after Minerva finished her suggestion.

"I highly doubt that will happen," she'd replied, cocking an eyebrow at them. With that, she had dismissed them from their office with a warning that she would know if they did not fulfill her request.

Later that week, the two men met in the Room of Requirement for their duel. It had begun rather innocently with fairly harmless jinxes and hexes. Severus couldn't recall who cast the first serious hex. All he recalled was that the duel had turned ugly soon after that.

At one point, they had lost their wands and had resorted to hand-to-hand combat. They had each managed to get in a few punches. Severus recalled how he had straddled Harry, ready to slap some sense into him. Instead of moving his head away, which would have been the sensible thing to do, Harry grabbed Severus by his cravat and pulled Severus down until their faces were mere inches apart. Without warning, Harry pressed his lips into Severus', engaging him in a passionate kiss that took Severus' breath away. Severus quickly overcame the initial shock, and kissed Harry back in kind.

XXX

"Don't go, Sev," Harry murmured into his side. "Stay a little longer, please."

"I've stayed long enough." Severus gingerly removed Harry's arms from his waist and slipped out of his grasp. "Unlike you, I'd actually like to have time to prepare for the day."

Harry mumbled an unintelligible response, closing his eyes and succumbing to sleep once more. Severus took one last look at Harry, sighing deeply as he stepped out of his bedroom.

He entered his sitting room, turned on the lights and lit his fireplace. He padded over to his small kitchenette and begun to prepare his morning cuppa. He caught sight of a calendar hanging on the wall, realising that there were only four days left until Christmas. He hadn't discussed plans for the upcoming holidays with Harry, which worried him for reasons he couldn't express. Harry also seemed less excited, which was unlike him. Severus cringed, remembering the possible reasons for Harry's attitude change.

"_What is this?" Severus' face twisted in agony and disbelief as he stepped into his private quarters. His eyes flitted about the room, taking in the various decorations that had been set up. A humongous tree had been placed in a corner, blocking his access to the shelf that contained his favourite books. A few presents had been tucked underneath the tree. Ornaments of all shapes and sizes hung from the tree's branches and glittered in the light of the room. Red, green, silver and gold tinsel adorned the walls. Red stockings with their names embroidered on them hung in front of the fireplace._

_A tray of cookies shaped like mittens, stockings, snowmen, gingerbread men, candy canes, Christmas trees, Santa hats and snowflakes had been placed on a table next to Severus' favourite reading chair. Two cups filled to the brim with eggnog, topped with whipped cream, cinnamon shavings and a cinnamon sticks sat next to the plate. Christmas music played softly from the wizard's wireless._

_Harry sat in the middle of the room with a Santa hat on his head and a few more strands of tinsel in his hands. He looked up at Severus and flashed him a sheepish smile. Harry's smile turned into a frown once he noticed the distraught look on Severus' face._

"_What have you done?" Severus cried, feeling his blood boil. He curled his hands into fists at his sides._

"_I figured I'd decorate," Harry began, attempting to placate the older man. "You've been busy, so I thought I'd do it." He stood up and crossed the room to the surly man._

"_I never agreed to this!" roared Severus, slamming his palms into his thighs. He withdrew his wand and began to banish Harry's hard work, sending all the decorations into the rubbish bin._

"_Stop it, Severus!" Harry pleaded. "Please!"_

_Severus ignored him and continued to remove every decoration until the only thing that remained was the tinsel in Harry's hands. Severus crossed the room, ripped it out of Harry's hands and threw it into the overflowing rubbish bin._

"_What the hell is your problem?" Harry spat, folding his arms over his chest. His eyes narrowed into slits, and he glared hard at Severus, trying to do all he could to prevent himself bursting into tears. Harry's happy feelings and excitement about spending the holidays with Severus quickly faded._

"_Like I said before, if you had been paying any attention, I do not want any of this!" Severus sneered. Severus' harsh tone hit Harry hard, and tears fell from his eyes. Harry didn't even bother wiping them away._

"_You're such an arse!" Harry stood up and looked directly at his lover's face. "I wanted to do something nice for us, but of course, you can't appreciate it!"_

"_Well, I am sorry to disappoint you," Severus shot back. "You were well aware of what you signed up for when you started this," Severus coolly replied, gesturing to the space between them. He lifted his chin and glared defiantly at Harry._

"_Of course!" hissed Harry. "It's all my fault!" Harry turned his heel and took off for Severus' bedroom, slamming the door behind him. _

_Severus flopped into his chair and pressed his head into his hands. The little brat had a knack for infuriating him. He should have known that Severus hadn't wanted to celebrate the upcoming holidays. Severus thought he'd made that clear. Evidently not, Severus scoffed, reaching into his liquor cabinet and pouring himself a finger's worth of his finest Firewhisky._

_XXX_

_Harry entered the room several minutes later, holding a slim white envelope in his shaking hands. "Here." Harry dropped it into Severus' lap, and adjusted the rucksack slung over his shoulders. _

_Severus ripped the envelope open, and his jaw dropped as he unfolded the pieces of paper. Harry had gifted Severus two front row seats to an upcoming lecture by Severus' favourite Italian potioneer._

"_I thought we could go together and make a holiday out of it," Harry explained as Severus unfolded the reservations to a posh hotel in the heart of Rome. "But, you know what – forget it! You can go by yourself!"_

_Harry stormed out of Severus' room, slamming the door behind him and not allowing Severus a chance to reply. He stalked down the corridors to his own room, still fuming over Severus' actions. His heart hurt as he walked away from the man who'd stolen his heart. _

_But, he knew that he wasn't going to stay around with someone who treated him like shite. He'd put up with years of poor treatment from Severus, and he decided to put his foot down. He deserved a lot better, and he'd rather remain alone than with stay with someone who treated him so poorly and thought so little of him._

_Harry spent the holidays at the Burrow. He broke down Christmas morning and confessed to Hermione the true nature of his relationship with Severus and the row they'd had. Hermione held him in her arms, comforting him while he cried his heart out. Thankfully, Hermione, Ron and the rest of the Weasley family were able to distract him, and he managed to have an enjoyable holiday._

_Severus attended the lecture and spent the holiday in Rome alone. His heart ached for his young lover, and he vowed a way to make it up to Harry – if he would still have him. Luckily for Severus, Harry had been willing to forgive and forget._

XXX

Ever curious, Severus extracted his wand from his robe pocket and cast every revealing spell he knew to see whether Harry had simply hidden the decorations. His efforts revealed nothing. Harry had actually listened to him this year.

Severus thought this would make him happy, but in had the opposite effect. He recalled the handsome smile plastered on Harry's face when Severus had caught him red-handed. His chest tightened, and he wished Harry ignored his request to keep his quarters free of any Christmas decorations. He missed everything about what Harry had created a year ago. He missed all the sights, sounds and smells of Christmas.

Severus thought for a minute to surprise Harry and put up some decorations. But, he dismissed the idea, unwilling to have to explain to Harry why he'd had a change of heart. Severus couldn't even begin to classify his feelings for Harry, let alone discuss them openly. They'd been together for two years, and no one knew of their relationship. Also, Severus doubted that the young man could feel something similar for him since Severus wasn't the best partner by any means.

Shaking his head, Severus pressed his lips into a thin line and drained his cuppa. He still had plenty to do before the dunderheads went home for the holidays. He glanced at his bedroom door and wondered if he should wake Harry. _Nope, I'll let him rest. _

He exited his room and took off for the Great Hall, his black robes billowing behind him. He donned his trademark scowl and growled at the tiny first year that had the sheer misfortune of bumping into him as he rounded a corner. _I've still got it. Sentimental sap, my arse._

XXX

The rest of the day passed by without a hitch for Severus. Perhaps the students were on their best behaviour, unwilling to cause any trouble lest it delayed them from going home. He couldn't wait for the peace and quiet that would come once the students had left. Only a handful stuck around for the holidays.

Severus was already in bed when Harry entered their chambers later that evening. Harry had given a detention, and then patrolled the corridors, making sure no students were out of bed. Harry had become rather excellent at finding the troublemakers, having been one during his years at Hogwarts. This only motivated those students to try harder to sharpen their skills in deception. But, Harry's Auror training had served him well, allowing him to quickly put an end to their schemes.

Severus placed his book on his nightstand and turned to face Harry. Harry leaned toward Severus and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. He bade Severus good night, crawled under the blankets, turned away from Severus and fell asleep.

Normally, Harry and Severus would chat about their day, and more often than not, they'd engage in some sort of intimacy. Severus instantly begun to worry and racked his brain, wondering what he could have possible done to upset Harry. He thought about it for a while and couldn't come up with anything. He fell into a troubled sleep that night, tossing and turning until the wee hours of the morning.

XXX

Harry's aloof attitude toward Severus continued for the next two days. He still spent the night in Severus' bed, and they engaged in intimacy one of the nights. However, Severus could tell that Harry wasn't as into it as usual. He seemed detached, and Severus still could not figure out what caused his behaviour.

Christmas Eve quickly approached, and Severus found himself reluctantly getting ready for the staff's annual party. They always celebrated once they sent the students home for the holidays. Severus scowled, dreading having to make polite conversation with his fellow professors. He absolutely hated unnecessary social engagements. He would have preferred to spend the evening doing anything else, but Minerva would have his head if he didn't show his face.

The party was already in full swing by the time Severus arrived. He slipped into the shadows, his onyx eyes scanning and room and its occupants. The other professors seemed to be enjoying themselves. They chatted animatedly and indulged in the special punch that had been prepared for the occasion.

Severus' eyes immediately found Harry. Harry sat in the middle of the room engaged in what looked like an intimate conversation with a young man, who Severus recognised to be former student, Oliver Wood. He'd been hired as Madam Hooch's teaching assistant. Rolanda planned to retire in the next year, and needed someone to fill her post.

Severus' eyes narrowed as he watched Oliver get a bit too close with Harry. Of course, Harry was oblivious to Oliver's overt flirtations. A wine glass rested precariously in Harry's fingertips, and his face was slightly pink.

"Oooh, I have presents!" Harry sing-songed, clapping his hands to call the attention of everyone in the room. He rose and distributed them to each professor, with the exception of Severus.

Severus' heart dropped a little, but he tried not to think much of it. Perhaps Harry would be giving him his gift in private later. Severus inched closer to Harry and Oliver, doing his best to remain hidden. He had to hear what they were discussing so animatedly.

"That save was _amazing_, wasn't it?" Oliver asked, touching Harry's forearm.

"It was!" agreed Harry, smiling at Oliver. "He's a great Keeper, isn't he?"

"He really is!"

"You're not going to miss it?"

"No… I mean, it was fun for a while," Oliver began, shrugging his shoulders. "But, it takes a toll on your body, if you know what I mean."

"True…"

Severus' heart continued to drop the more he listened to Harry and Oliver's conversation. He started to doubt whether Harry would want to be with him, and if Harry would prefer to be with a man closer to his age, and one who shared his interests.

"Mistletoe!" exclaimed Professor Sprout, calling attention to the plant that hung above Harry and Oliver's heads.

"Oooh!" exclaimed the other professors, encouraging the two men to kiss.

Harry and Oliver looked up, confirming the mistletoe's presence over their heads. Harry looked at Oliver, shrugged and inched closer toward the well-built man. Oliver stepped closer, cupped Harry's chin and tilted it up to him. He slowly lowered his head and pressed his lips lightly against Harry's.

To Severus' horror, Harry tightened his grip around Oliver's waist, pulling the taller man closer so he could return his kiss. The two men remained attached at the lips for a few seconds, before pulling away from each other. Harry finally made eye contact with Severus. He didn't appear apologetic for his behaviour. He simply shrugged at Severus and returned to his conversation with Oliver as if nothing had happened.

"Control yourself!" snarled a harsh voice next to Severus. A bony hand reached over, plucking the tumbler of Firewhisky out of his hand. Severus scowled and turned to his right, noticing Minerva frowning at him. "Severus, do not do something you'll regret," she warned.

Still incredibly angry, jealous and hurt over Harry's behaviour, Severus merely glared at Minerva, unable to verbally respond to her.

"Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. Do it before it's too late." Severus opened his mouth to tell Minerva off, but she had already left. Severus left the party minutes later before his emotions got the best of him.

XXX

Harry climbed into their bed a few hours later. Severus set his book down on the bedside table and pulled Harry toward him. He attempted kiss Harry, but Harry turned away.

"Stop, I'm tired," Harry muttered, pushing Severus' hands off his chest.

"Is something wrong?" Severus peered into Harry's piercing emerald irises. He briefly thought to penetrate Harry's mind, but decided against it.

"Everything's fine," Harry responded with a heavy sigh. "I'm really tired. Can we talk later?"

"What are our holiday plans?" Severus burst out, no longer able to keep his composure.

"_Our_ holiday plans?" yelped Harry, his mouth dropping open.

"Yes, what are _we_ doing?"

"Severus, I'm really sorry, but I've already accepted an invitation to spend the holidays at the Burrow."

"The _Burrow_?" Severus replied, his eyes widening and his voice higher than usual.

"Yes."

"When?"

"Two weeks ago."

"You didn't think to inform me of your plans?"

Harry shook his head.

"Why not?"

"Why does it matter? You don't want to celebrate."

"All right." Severus knew he should have admitted his wish to spend the holidays with Harry, but he couldn't get the words out.

"You're not upset?" Harry asked after a long moment of silence passed.

"No, why would I be?"

"Ok, good. I'll see you when I get back?"

"Yes."

"Good night, then."

"Good night."

Severus felt cold when Harry's lips touched his. Severus turned away, allowing a single tear to fall down his face. Harry's rejection wounded him, and his heart hurt knowing that he'd most likely ruined the best thing that had ever happened to him. Harry's cold attitude and unwillingness to talk hurt the most. It wasn't like Harry to be so closed off.

XXX

Severus awoke the following morning, finding Harry's side of the bed empty. He glanced at both nightstands, hoping to find a note, only to find them empty.

Severus let out a frustrated yell and began to rifle through all his possessions, trying to find whether Harry had left him anything. He still couldn't believe that Harry hadn't given him anything. It was so unlike Harry, and he'd taken Severus' request not to celebrate the holidays way too far.

Severus cursed himself for being unable to voice his true feelings. He was more than willing to allow a few decorations, but more than anything, he wanted to spend the holidays with the man who'd captured his heart. Unfortunately, Severus felt like it was too little too late. It wouldn't surprise him if Harry had moved onto Oliver Wood. After all, they looked incredibly chummy at the party. That would be one plausible reason for Harry's change in attitude toward him.

Severus stormed back into his bedroom, haphazardly throwing clothing into an overnight bag. He had to get away from Hogwarts. There were too many memories of Harry all over the castle, and most importantly, inside his chambers. Severus' onyx eyes scanned the room once more for any sign from Harry before he Apparated to Spinner's End.

Nothing sounded better than a few bottles of Firewhisky to drown his sorrow. Perhaps he could use the days to forget about his relationship with Harry. It'd be hard, but he could do it. It wasn't like they'd been together that long anyway.

XXX

Severus opened the door to his home, and his nostrils immediately filled with the smell of sugar cookies. He frowned and walked into his sitting room. He spotted Harry standing in the middle of it with his back turned to him, finalising the last of his decorations. He hung two stockings, a red one with his name on it and the other dark green with Severus' name on it, over the roaring fireplace.

"Harry."

Harry turned around and locked eyes with Severus. A huge smile formed on his face. The two men stared at each other before Severus slowly made his way toward Harry.

"Happy Christmas," Harry greeted once Severus stood in front of him. "I hope you like it."

"I love it," Severus replied, pulling Harry into his arms and pressing his lips against his. "I love you, Harry," Severus whispered into the outer shell of Harry's ear as he broke their kiss. Severus' eyes widened, realising what he'd just admitted. A small part of him hoped Harry hadn't heard him.

"Oh, Severus! I love you, too!" cried Harry, wrapping his arms around Severus' neck.

"Really?" Severus inquired, unwilling to believe the words that had tumbled out of his lover's lips. "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

"Harry, I'm not the best partner," Severus warned, shaking his head and trying to pull away. Harry ignored him and wrapped his arms even tighter around Severus' neck, refusing to let him go. "I'm selfish, I'm stubborn, I like to be in control, and I am the jealous type."

"Yes. I love _everything_ about you," Harry declared. "You have nothing to be jealous about, Severus. I love you and nobody else." Harry quickly pulled Severus back into another heated kiss.

"How did you know I'd come here?" Severus asked once they'd pulled away from each other.

"Just a hunch," Harry replied, smiling at Severus.

"Harry, I'm so sorry. I didn't get you anything."

"It's all right," Harry responded, running his hands up and down Severus' chest. "All I want... All I've ever wanted was you."

"Then, I'm all yours, Harry. All yours," Severus whispered.

"Come here," commanded Harry. "I think it's time I open my gift," he purred, smirking at Severus.

And with that, the two men embraced each other, ready to celebrate their first Christmas together.


End file.
